TV show helps grandma to love herself again after childhood trauma of sex abuse

A woman who suffered sexual, physical and emotional abuse as a teenager says she has got her life back thanks to a TV reality programme.

According to healthcare assistant Sharon Jones, 59, who lives in Groeslon, near Caernarfon, her traumatic childhood had left her in a “dark place” for many years.

The mother-of-three and grandmother-of-two opened up about her troubled past on the ground-breaking S4C series, Tŷ Ffit, which aims to inspire Sharon and four other people to transform their lives and “love themselves again”.

The group meet up over a period of seven weekends in an idyllic house on the Anglesey coast.

They focus on improving their physical, mental and emotional well-being with the help of mentors – including Wales rugby legend Shane Williams and Paralympic champion Aled Davies –  and experienced experts guiding them every step of the way.

The show, presented by Lisa Gwilym, is broadcast at 9pm on Tuesday evenings on S4C.

“Horrendous childhood”

Sharon revealed she had always had a complicated relationship with food, stemming from a difficult childhood. She said she has tried every diet and her husband, John, had tried his best to encourage her to go walking and exercise.

Just over four years ago she was diagnosed with a form of skin cancer called Basal cell carcinoma.

After months of worry before the diagnosis was confirmed, the cancerous lump was removed with surgery and Sharon has been given the all-clear.

Over a meal in the house, she told her mentor, open water swimming instructor Caris Bowen from Llanelli, she applied to be part of Tŷ Ffit to be equipped with the right tools to improve her health.

She  said: “I had a horrendous childhood. I was starved and beaten on a weekly basis, from the age of nine until I was 17. The only thing I heard as a child was, ‘you’re ugly, nobody likes you and no matter what you say nobody will ever believe you’.”

“So I’ve lived with it ever since and thought no one would believe me. I doubt if people like me, and I always call myself ugly. If you’ve had that as a child it’s stuck in your head for ever.

“And when I was 13 someone sexually assaulted me and I hid it for 45 years. I didn’t tell anyone and my biggest fear that someone was going to take me and finish what they started.

“I know it’s just in my head but I was in such a dark place I completely lost who I was. I was afraid of my own shadow.

“Taking part in the programme will be worth it if it inspires just one person to report the abuse that’s happening to them and to seek help.

“I hope that by speaking out and telling my story I can show that you can come out the other side.”

Light after darkness

After the programme Sharon added: “Caris was in tears and everyone was very emotional but I was pleased that I was being listened to and what I was saying was being believed.

“I’ve been in such a dark place and I’m so happy that Tŷ Ffit have given me the tools I needed.

“They’re priceless and they’ve given me  back my life and given me the confidence to do things I believed would never happen.

“I set myself challenges like taking the dog out for a walk. And then push myself to go just a little bit further and further.

“After just two weeks of following the Tŷ Ffit health plan I felt something’s changed. I’m so proud of myself being able to do that and it’s down to Caris, the others and Tŷ Ffit,” she said.

One of the ways Sharon’s confidence was boosted was by Caris encouraging her to overcome her phobia of water and going swimming in the sea.

Sharon said: “I’m afraid of water. My father drowned when I was nine years of age and I think that formed a sort of block in my head. I’m able to swim of sorts but if I can’t touch the floor I get into a panic.

“After going for a swim in the sea with Caris first of all, and then with the others I felt completely different, it was absolutely fantastic. I’m not afraid anymore.”

Having worked as a healthcare assistant for 30 years, Sharon’s  current role involves assisting a District Nurse in attending patients at night time.

“It is very satisfying and rewarding serving people who are in need of care at a difficult time in their lives. But the nature of the job means that I have a lot of time off. If I work nights I have five days off I like to have a gin and tonic.

“If there are six cans of gin and tonic in the fridge I’ll drink them in one session. If I see someone on television drinking I think it would be nice to have a glass of wine. I don’t have a drink problem but I do drink too much. John tells me to stop.”

Before entering Tŷ Ffit all five participants underwent a thorough medical examination and Sharon’s Liver Function Test revealed a level twice what it should be for a woman of her age.

“I was shocked by what Dr Sherif Khalifa told me. He said the possibility of a stroke or heart attack was higher because of the drinking. That was the spark. I stopped drinking alcohol,”  she said.

Series producer Siwan Haf believes a series like Tŷ Ffit has not been done before.

” Tŷ Ffit is more than just a television programme – we are changing people’s lives, for the better. It has given Sharon and the other participants an opportunity to get to know their own bodies – and minds.

“During the series,  they are extremely open about their own mental health and we are very grateful to them for that. It has been transformational for all five of them and we hope viewers will continue to watch this unique series and follow their personal journey.

“We’re also hopeful that the viewers will pick up some handy hints and tips about diet and exercise which they can adopt into their own lives.”

Experts

The four other Tŷ Ffit participants are engineer Arwel Cullen, 34, from Pontllyfni, near Caernarfon and Becky Richards, 41, a secondary school teacher from Saron near Ammanford.

Dylan Edwards, 38, is originally from Bontnewydd near Caernarfon, but now lives where he works as a Video Games Analyst.

Gwawr Job-Davies, 40, from Old Colwyn, works as a Physiotherapist with Betsi Cadwaladr Health Board.

As well as Shane Williams and Aled Davies, the other mentors are wilderness survival expert Naomi Allsworth, originally from Crymych and gym owner and fitness instructor from Porthmadog Siôn ‘Monty’.

The Tŷ Ffit team includes four renowned experts in the health and wellness field. They include  Cadi Fôn, a personal trainer and business owner from Dyffryn Nantlle; Angharad Griffiths, a nutritionist originally from Carmarthen and now based in Bethesda, Dr. Sherif Khalifa, a GP in Cardiff; and Sioned Lewis, the Tŷ Ffit counsellor.

Tŷ Ffit is broadcast on S4C every Tuesday at 9pm. It is also available for streaming on S4C Clic, BBC iPlayer and other platforms. English subtitles are available. You can also follow the exclusive Tŷ Ffit plan on the website: www.s4c.cymru/tyffit